Where the Jews Live

There is a suburb of Cleveland called Beachwood.  The town soccer program, which is open to residents and non-residents, is very popular because they offer a “no Saturday games” option.  While we don’t live in Beachwood, my son Asher plays in this program.  Here’s how you know this secular, run of the mill sports program is filled with Jews (who are grateful for the “no Saturdays” option):

Soccer Coach #1: “Jack, Rick, Ra’anan, Ariel, Andrew, Uriel . . . heads’ up!  Look alive!”

Soccer Coach #2: “Yehudi!  Ben-Tzion!  Sam!  Jason!  Gavi!  To the left!  Look left! Hey what are doing?  LEFT!  SMOLAH! [‘left’ in Hebrew]”

Spectator #1: “Atah yode’ah mah?  Hem tovim!” [translastion: “You know what?  They’re good!”]

Spectator #2: “Ani yode’ah, ani yode’ah!  Ani lo ma’amin – shavuah she’avar hem c’mo behemot.” [translation: “I know, I know.  I can’t believe it – last week they were like cattle.]

Gotta love Beachwood.

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5 thoughts on “Where the Jews Live

  1. that is too funny.

    wish we had that around here – a no saturday option. frankly, i’d like a no weekend sports option. hm…guess that’s not much of a choice. that’s one of the reasons we went with karate – it’s a year-round sport but at the moment is only weekly (no meets yet)…

  2. ezzie: the girls’ team is even more hilarious. half the team is in long sleeve shirts, calf-length skirts and leggings, with tube socks, shin guards and cleats.

    phyllis: i don’t mind sundays. we got lucky and the games were late afternoon, so my husband could mostly be there. no one has a funeral at 4pm here.

    zahava: it’s hilarious, but i have to say we are very, very lucky to have a program available to us that has the no-saturday option.

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